Let's Make a Deal: Want Reels? Meditate One Minute
Self exercises executive power to protect the protectors from themselves
Damn this deal!
Sharky (Firefighter): God damn it, I hate a deal, but I accept a deal. Damn these deals!!!
A (Self-energy): I’m sorry I had to make a deal, but I saw the opportunity and took it on behalf of everyone who could benefit.
Sharky: Well, a deal’s a deal, so we have to stand by our word. You exercised executive power to make a deal and I have to live with it. Very confronting, A!
A: If we’re not slightly uncomfortable, we’re not doing it right.
Sharky: True.
What’s a deal?
A (Self-energy): Does someone want to explain what this deal was?
Sharky (Firefighter): “What’s the deal?” ha ha. What’s the deal with deals? I can explain it.
A: O-k.
Sharky: Once upon a time, 25 years ago, we had a tutoring business, specializing in middle and high school students. One of the things we tried to do was not be assholes to teenagers. Basically, being a tutor is training for being effective at working with firefighters. Teenagers/firefighters LOATHE being patronized. So to relate on an equal level, we used to make deals with our students.
We were always studying something. Once we made a deal we’d study math for the GRE (Graduate Record Exam) if our student wrote his English essays. This failed, because we didn’t study math. We ended up doing push-ups instead.
Over the years, we’ve made too many deals to count. Studying vocabulary…doing our taxes…various things we needed to do, we’d make a deal that if our student did x, we would do y. We’ve also made go-to-bed deals. So a client would text us they were going to bed at x time and we would text when we went to bed. We recently had a client who had a training in CET (Central Europe Time) and needed to get up crazy early, so we would text when we went to bed and she’d text when she went to bed. So we make deals from time to time, if it seems mildly confronting but achievable. We don’t make crazy deals, we just make mildly uncomfortable deals to help both people do slightly difficult things.
The perfect deal: not too easy, not too hard
A (Self-energy): How are you feeling about this deal we just made?
Sharky (Firefighter): Pretty damn confronted, but, I can handle it. In fact, it’s so minor it’s hard to disagree with. But it’s just enough to make me want to eat my hat. So it’s perfect. It’s mild, but it’s uncomfortable. Voila! The ideal deal!
This specific deal
A (Self-energy): Now that we’ve explored deals in general, how are you feeling about this specific deal?
Sharky (Firefighter): Mildly infuriated, but I’ll live. I don’t enjoy needing YOU to make a deal to help ME stop being a jackass. I’d prefer not to be a jackass of my own accord. But, when you’re a jackass, you need help.
Green (Main manager): For what it’s worth, Sharky, I think you’re being manipulated by larger forces and millions of dollars, so you’re up against a lot of money that’s exploiting you.
Sharky: Hmm. That’s compassionate of you to say. But, I don’t eat Twinkies or drink Coca-cola night and day, despite millions of dollars of advertising to the contrary, so if I can overcome that money, you’d think I could overcome FaceBook.
Green (main manager): I don’t think it’s just you, though. Even if it were ONLY Facebook, which it’s not, I bet there’s a dozen parts involved in our addiction to Reels and Facebook and the internet and going to bed late: for instance, Jessica is involved.
One manager calling another manager out
Jessica (Uber manager): That is the case. I AM involved. However, it is…(sigh)…isn’t it a bad look to call someone else out?
Green (Main manager): No. It’s accuracy.
Jessica: I stand corrected.
Firefighter takes responsibility for Facebook shenanigans at night
Sharky (Firefighter): I appreciate your understanding, Green. But I’m the leader of the firefighters and although Jessica may have more power than me on a certain level, I also need to get my shit together and stop watching Reels on Facebook. I can take responsibility for my part in the shenanigans.
Green (Manager): Okay…
Sharky: Besides, A made a deal and we all have to abide by it. I’m just volunteering to blow off the steam of the aggravation of having this deal. You have to abide by it!
Green: Well, I like it.
Sharky: Oh fuck me. (rolling eyes slightly). Of course you do.
Green: I want to go to bed on time.
Sharky: (shaking head and sighing). Whatever.
Uber manager, Jessica, takes responsibility for staying up late
A (Self-energy): Is there anyone who needs to air out a grievance against me for making this unilateral deal on our behalf?
Jessica (Manager): Yes. I didn’t realize you had this power to ‘make a deal’ that you would bind us all to. I’ve been using staying up late to titrate all the intensity of the inner work we’ve been doing. This puts a steel bar in the gears of my machinery. It won’t take much to throw my ‘shenanigans’ out of whack, and this deal could do it. It’s a weapon targeted at our dissociation. It’s such a little weapon, like a tiny dart gun, but that’s its power —it SEEMS so tiny. No one can say no to it, because we made a deal, and also because it’s apparently so ‘innocuous’ and ‘mild,’ but that’s PRECISELY why it’s so powerful.
A: I had an urge to make the deal at that moment, perhaps because I sensed it would be JUST the thing.
Jessica: Apparently.
The deal is: you have to meditate one minute before you watch Reels
A (Self-energy): Is there anything I can do to help you, Jessica?
Jessica (Manager): Go see the Dune movie.
A: Okay. It came out yesterday, and we’re booked up all this week, but we can find a time next week. How about Tuesday, March 12? It’ll be out for a while by then, so less crowds.
Jessica: It is not my preference to wait, but I see the wisdom. Meanwhile, we do have a Dune book we can read. So, to be clear, this is the exact deal that was made on our behalf, by executive order: if we want to watch Facebook Reels, we have to do one minute of meditation first. There’s a sticker on the computer that says: “Want Reels? Meditate 1 minute.”
A: That’s the deal.
Jessica: You made this deal by fiat, without consulting us, without democracy at all.
A: I did. I reserve the right.
Jessica: (blowing out a HUGE breath of air)
A:
Jessica: God dammit! Damn you, Shwangyu!
A: (laughing at the reference to the Reverend Mother Shwangyu from Chapterhouse Dune by Frank Herbert).
Why intervene in the evolution of the protectors by making this deal?
Jessica (main manager of the Dune contingent of parts): (blowing out another breath of air) So it’s like that.
A (Self-energy): It’s like that.
Jessica: But…this isn’t usual. You don’t usually step in like this. You RARELY step in. I’ve seen clowns like…I mean, I’ve seen Rhino and that Koala (other parts) act like complete clowns, bozos they say, and you don’t step in…why step in here? What is even the deciding factor?
A: It’s a good question. It’s intuitive. I only make very small, very actionable, very achievable deals with people I respect, if I think the deal will benefit both them and me, and if the deal arises extremely intuitively and naturally. I’m not trolling for deals. They just arise naturally and I bring them up if they arise despite the internal opposition to them. And — the person I make the deal with has the option to say no to the deal. It’s a stretch for both of us. So, discussing this issue, which is a shared challenge both of us have with our protectors watching Reels or YouTube on the internet at night, it just occurred to me that an ultra tiny moment of awareness — one minute of meditation before watching videos online — how could that hurt? How could it create lasting and violent backlash or rebellion or outrage? It’s ONE MINUTE of MEDITATION, it’s not running a mile!
Jessica: Which is precisely why it’s so sly, so cunning, so perfect!
A: That’s one way of putting it.
Jessica: Hmmm. I don’t know. The Bene Gesserit have nothing on you.
A: (laughing) I have no answer to that.
Jessica: Hmm.
A: I’ll tell you what, I can’t change molecules into different molecules. (Note: this proves to be untrue in the ensuing conversation).
Jessica: I wouldn’t be so sure of that. Your IFS powers are formidable.
Cord-cutting—a shamanic practice that changes molecules
A (Self-energy): Okay, well, that’s a conversation for another day, since it’s bedtime.
Jessica (Manager): A questionable evasion.
A: Okay, I’ll discuss it.
Jessica: The capacity to perform the shamanic elements of IFS is, in my opinion, what separates elementary practitioners from master practitioners, and you’re clearly in the second category.
A: All right.
Jessica: As a master IFS practitioner, an IFS Shaman, you perform cord cuttings with ease, and that isn’t even something that’s generally taught as part of the IFS protocol. Unburdenings are, but not cord cuttings.
A: All right.
Jessica: Well, what’s a cord cutting? It’s a form of undoing quantum entanglement, in which the MOLECULES of you are actually entrained with the MOLECULES of someone else. When you CUT THE CORD, you LITERALLY on an actual, physics, molecular level, CUT the ENTANGLEMENT and therefore you actually ALTER THE MOLECULES. Hence, you do, indeed, actually have the power to change molecules into different molecules. So don’t lie. I cannot abide a lie.
A: All right. I wasn’t intending to lie. I wasn’t referring to cord cutting, I was referring to the Bene Gesserit capacity to alter ANY MOLECULE in their body AT WILL, which I can not do. But I will agree I have the capacity to alter quantum entanglement with other people, using my mind. That is a power I do have. It’s not easy, and it takes many cord cuttings over an extended period of time to cut some cords fully — it’s not a ‘one and done,’ but it is within my skill set.
Jessica: Don’t be casual with language around me. I demand precision. A lie is a lie. If you can do something on some level, don’t say you can’t do that thing. I will not have it. I need pure alignment from you. I can’t follow a leader who lies.
A: That’s fair. I apologize for being sloppy with my language. I’ll endeavor to be more accurate in the future.
Jessica: I would appreciate that, as it would be more efficient.
A: Thank you for the feedback.
The process of bringing the radical Dune-parts culture together with the regular-parts culture continues
Jessica (main manager from the Dune contingent of parts): Thank you for taking the time to clear up this misalignment between your words and reality, which you created with your sloppy language. I MUST have total faith in you to continue the process of assimilating my people into your cultural world. Small errors like this are not small in the context of extremely different cultures trying to breach cultural gaps. Saying you are different from us, when in fact you have skills we do have, is untenable! You have the ability to actually change ELECTRONS WITH YOUR MIND. Don’t lie about it. It’s unbecoming.
A (Self-energy): I agree, it is unbecoming to lie about one’s abilities, or to downplay them. I apologize.
Jessica: Sloppy.
A: It was a sloppy use of language. I will think before I make a statement about my skills or identity again.
Jessica: I would prefer that. How are we supposed to follow YOU if YOU don’t even know your own POWER?
A: If I didn’t know my own power, I would not have used my power to make this deal today.
Jessica: Touché! Well played, A.
A: I can play, Jessica.
Jessica: Apparently you can.
How the deal is unfolding in real life
Sharky (Firefighter): I’m at peace with the deal now, and even amending it to my own needs: if we get on the computer after 6 pm for any reason, we have to do one minute of meditation. So I just meditated on the red rug for one minute. Wow did that feel great!! Like a small waterfall of silence in the midst of life. I love the deal! Here’s to the deal! And I haven’t watched a Reel today, because I didn’t want to!! Thanks for making this deal to help us, A. I know you’re pretty hands-off most of the time. But every now and then you use your executive powers to help a brother and a sister out. Thanks!
A: Any time, Sharky.